An authentic “enchanted relationship” is one in which you take time to transform suffering and pain into happiness.

When we are enchanted, we can accept our partner’s love, as well as give our own. We can be cared for, as well as give care. We can learn, as well as teach. We can depend on eachother, as well as be independent enough to know our own minds and bodies.

Being enchanted makes us open to the creativity and spirituality working through us. It helps us support and contribute to eachother’s dreams, hopes, desires and ultimate joy.

Here are 13 ways to enchant your relationship and make it solid enough to last:

1. Never take your partner for granted.
2. Treat eachother as equals.
3. Always compliment your partner on his or her good qualities.
4. Have concern for his or her total welfare.
5. Really listen to eachother’s words and feelings.
6. Get to the root of any anger, frustration, anxiety or fear.
7. Always be happy to see eachother and smile.
8. Have the courage to be imperfect.
9. Don’t demand change from anyone but yourself.
10. Eat the same food, so your breath will smell the same.
11. Never go to sleep angry.
12. Share your dreams.
13. Have a sense of humor.

Here are 13 unenchanted moves to avoid:

1. Be possessive or controlling.
2. Be preoccupied with yourself.
3. Lack tolerance and understanding.
4. Don’t listen.
5. Put your partner down.
6. Be indifferent.
7. Don’t treat your partner as an equal.
8. Be superficial, hostile, jealous or resentful.
9. Blame others.
10. Eat foods that leave your breath smelling badly.
11. Lie.
12. Take eachother for granted.
13. Leave the toilet seat up.

*To learn more and support Ellen’s Well (an initiative that provides psychosocial support for breast cancer survivors and their families), join us for a private shopping event with raffles, refreshments, models, music and magic on Sunday, August 10th from 3pm-6pm: The Enchanted World Emporium, 8 Main Street, East Hampton, NY (Enchanted gift bags of $50 value with purchases over $100).